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Finally... AN UPDATE!

Posted by justme on 5:14 PM
Hey people,

No, I am not dead. Some days I might disagree, but, well, I'm here. So without further ado, here's the next episode of My Life: The Soap Opera.

For those of you who don't care to read the marathon post ahead, here's the breakdown of my life since my last post: I loved. I lost. I evicted. I gained a new roommate. I narrowly avoided a full breakdown. I gained an incredible appreciation for certain people in my life. I started over, but discovered that some things don't change.

(Also, I went to Hawaii and became an "official adult", but those really don't need elaboration so I'll put them here.)

Whew. And now, for the dirty details (because I know you're all fascinated by those)...

My love life: Yes, I had a boyfriend. We met through an online mental health community, became friends, then became "official" sometime in October. It was a long-distance thing, since he lives in England and I don't. Things were going really well for a while, but then Depression got in the way. We both have it, and that led to a lot of emotional baggage. It didn't help that I'm a full-time student and he's not, so it felt like I couldn't be there for him enough. Long story short, I ended up cutting it off just before Christmas because it just wasn't healthy for either of us anymore. I really do care about the guy and I felt TERRIBLE breaking up with him, but it needed to be done.

Roommates: I didn't mention it online before now because I didn't want to stir things up, but the roommates that moved in with me in September turned out to be pretty terrible. I've moved past the petty stage (finally - apologies to those of you who had to put up with my whining), so I'll just say that they were first-years, and were not ready for an adult apartment. They didn't know how to clean up after themselves - we're talking 4-day-old macaroni on the stove, here - and wanted to be loud and party, which caused a LOT of stress and tension. Seriously, it was at the point where I was more stressed to come home that I was to go to my exams. It meant that I spent a lot of time at the gym and the library, which was great for my fitness and my marks, but my stress level was through the roof. So after several, er, interesting confrontations with their parents, we evicted them.
     The silver lining is that after a frantic search, I found a wonderful new roommate. She is everything that the ex-roommates weren't, which makes me so very glad. I'm finally feeling at home in my own home, and it's a wonderful feeling. I really do love this apartment!

My near-breakdown: Thanks to the roommate situation, the insane amount of schoolwork followed by exams, and serious homesickness, I was thisclose to losing it for most of December. I actually ended up in tears one evening, just because I was so stressed. I mentioned this to my mother, and she made arrangements to fly out two weeks later. It was WONDERFUL. She helped ease some of the tension between myself and the roommates, was there for me during the breakup, and just generally helped me forget the mess that was my life. We had a good time shopping (especially at IKEA!) and Taking Back the Living Room. I seriously don't know how I would have gotten through the last few weeks of school without her visiting.

I love you guys: Aside from the whole roommate debacle, which I whined about constantly, I really didn't say much about my stress level. Still, there were a few people who knew and were a big help for me - still are, actually. I don't want to name names, but there were 4 or 5 people who did anything they could to help me, whether it was through advice-giving, getting me out of the apartment or giving me a shoulder to cry on. Your help meant a lot to me. More than I can even express. I still have a lot of trouble asking for help, so the fact that you went above and beyond is a Big Deal to me. Thank you.

Starting over: So coming back to school in January was a fresh start for me. New semester (and, for a week or so, less homework), new roommate, new year. And everything has been going really well for the better part of the past 3 weeks. Unfortunately, the shine is starting to wear off and reality's setting in. A triple-whammy of hormones, 7 major assignments and grey skies means that my mood is pretty freaking low right now. There is an end in sight though, since reading week is coming up soonish, so I'm just pushing through til then.

Finally, it's worth mentioning that I've been sticking with a 3x/week workout routine since before Christmas. I try to make a point of getting in one half-hour workout, one 45-min(ish) swim and one INTENSE hour-long session with a personal trainer each week. Can't say I'm losing much weight because my diet is still in need of a permanent overhaul, but I'm definitely in better shape than I was when I started. It's pretty encouraging :)

So yeah, that's The View From Here for now. Congrats if you actually made it though!

TTYL,
Me


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